how to play a lane without losing it.

Title might be bit confusing, but what I am trying to say is that I need guideness on how to play a lane without winning or losing it. To get to farm the lane and wait for team fights. But every time I try this I seem to get crushed on, and i will be dead in about 8-12 minutes, I want to farm the lane and just get a lot of cs, and punish my enemy if i can with my jungle. But I will always end up losing cuz my opponent doesn't want to farm himself he just goes on me ending up with me being low while he doesn't farm until I'm zoned out. I need some guide on what to do, so can be a better player. Also this elo is bout high silver low gold
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