Hey guys :D im back with ban blog again its almost been a week now since I got banned its crazy how fast the time has went by and im feeling a lot better since the start of all this its honestly been keeping my spirits high and thanks again if you have been reading since the start you guys are amazing!
**where my time matters**
Today i didn't play any games at all, which is crazy for me usually i play games all the time like legit every single day for about 4-5 hours but honestly, I sat down in the living room when i got home from work and instantly just got hooked on talking and spending time with my family. usually we will just have a small chat then do our own things but we just sat there talking the whole night and having laughs all round it honestly lifted my mood so much they honestly mean so much to me and i dont know what i would do without them they are just great and they have helped me a lot these past months i cant thank them enough.
since i got banned from league I have just been doing a crazy amount of overtime at my work like usually i would put a lot of time into the game and make sure i would always have time for it but honestly since its not there i have just been putting 100% into my job and im loving it even more like my colleagues are really good friends they make me laugh every single day we just have a great time overall like its been crazy on my days off I wish im at work because it just keeps my mind off all the bad that has happened plus keeps me healthy with all the hard work haha my legs straight up feel like jelly but hey its worth it honestly
Even though I am happy as of now i am worried that its going to get shattered in the future when i get unbanned, I dont know what it is but i cant help but feel something terrible is going to happen but my mentality has always been pretty weak sadly due to anger issues and really bad depression nearly this whole year but finally im feeling so happy but that alone makes me worry that its not going to be for long and i will be back where i started
**My feelings on league as of now**
Im not excited to get back into the game honestly as of right now because of all these worries of me turning back into a depressed mess. im not blaming the game for that dont get me wrong but it feels like it has some part to it and i dont even know why but its something I need to look into during my ban phase as i want to be the 100% positive player that i started as in this game for you guys and myself because i love this community and i have to make up for the mistakes i have made
Thank you so much for reading guys! it was a pretty short one because honestly my day was pretty simple and i was just happy and thats what matters most right?
Have fun on the Rift guys and stay positive :D